I felt a niggling of something as I read this, a hope springing from how God gave David strength and victory to conquer the unconquerable and live triumphantly. I especially was ministered to and challenged by what my devotional notes said, though and think they are worth sharing.
"Through the high and low points of our lives, God graciously provides for our needs. As we experience this, our lives can be filled with joyful expressions of praise to him.
A heart filled with God's heart is free both to glorify and to enjoy God. There is no grimness in David's relationship with God. He could weep out his loneliness and fear to the Lord, but he could also dance with unrestrained fervor. When we love God with all our heart we can openly express our emotions to him, and then to others. He wants us to be real with him. When we are in the valley of despair or the mountain peaks of sublime joy, we can express it.
David's abandoned freedom to express his praise is contrasted with his wife Michal's reserve and contempt... Michal was like her father Saul. Her emotional energy was not guided by firm beliefs about God's sovereignty and grace. There was little in her mind about God's loveingkindness, and therefore little capacity of emotional delight in him...
There are Michals in all our lives. People whose minds are starved for liberating truth about God and whose emotions are stunted by malnutrition of lively belief. The conviction of God's grace results in the expression of joy...
The tragedy of religion is that it produces more Michals than Davids...
From: Lord of the impossible by Lloyd John Ogilvie.
I was stunned to read this this morning after what I shared yesterday. It describes so precisely what I am struggling with.
I'm a bit of a David. I wear my spiritual emotions on my sleeve. When I'm feeling passion, I express it. When I need encouragement, I cry out for it. And this is one of the main things that makes me feel so "awkward" and hungry in a community of stoic, straight laced mennonites who like to keep their emotions packaged up nicely in their bedside tables to be removed and unwrapped only for those in their most intimate circle, if then.
Fellowship was made to be corporate, and true fellowship can't take place without an element of vulnerability and honesty and "to heck with the mask, this is how I really feel and this is what I'm hungry for" and a mutual challenging, encouraging, connecting between souls.
And having this with a few intimate friends while feeling a complete disconnect between myself and church leadership and the body at large doesn't cut it for me. Then I start to ask myself "why even go to church?" The only answer I have is "because we are supposed to." "to socially connect with the body at large". "To be a good example to our kids." Those are pathetic answers and they make me feel pathetic. There is so much more God has designed for us. He wants to meet us with power, He wants us to be centred on Christ, He wants to charge us through the preaching and uplift us as we surrender ourselves in worship to Him. He wants us to be bound together in the bonds of prayer and to experience the intimate love that is birthed out of confession and forgiveness.
We have experienced this in fellowship, and once you have, it's not something that allows you to live contentedly with less. So I struggle within myself, a square peg in a round hole. Afraid to even share my thoughts because they are not uplifting, or encouraging, but stem from the discouragement within me. And yet, it's not out of disrespect or negativity, it's out of hunger and thirst for more of God and more of the victory that He wants to pour out in all of our lives, on our church and on our corporate and individual ministry.
ah... now that was an early morning rant if I ever did see one. Forgive me. Sometimes the dam just backs up so full there's nowhere to spill but over. And then there's a big muddy aftermath... sorry.
A muddy aftermath? How pleased God must be with a heart that longs for honesty - to be real before Him. God created us in His image - He gave us our emotions. And while we should not be ruled by them, we should pay attention to what they are telling us. To grieve or rejoice, those are gifts from God. I have walked in the valley of discouragement, too often in my life, and it led to darkness. Yuck, that's not too encouraging. Then I read Isaiah 45:3, "I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." And then came James 1:2-3, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops..." Darkness and trials develop in me what just doesn't seem to come in the light. Which is not bothersome to God, because the darkness is as light to Him. He sees what is going on even when I miss it. There in the midst of my darkness - He calls me by name and I know He is the Lord God. In the midst of the darkness He give me treasures, mostly the richness of His presence. I'm learning to count is ALL joy! Hence the name of my blog. Hope this encourages you. You are such an encouragement and I have enjoyed peeking in and listening to your heart. It is a creation of beauty!
I still want to talk about this all over coffee...
I loved this part: "when you hear the sound of marching in the tops of the balsam trees, then you shall act promptly, for then the Lord will have gone out before you..." v24
I love this image of the Army of the Lord going out invisibly before David, but that he could hear it in the tops of the trees. Like a hundred or so angels marching on ahead of him. Wonderful.
We are reading our way through the bible one chapter per day. The idea behind my personal reading plan is to read through books chronologically, but not solely one book at a time. Thus on Monday we read from the books of the law, Tuesday the books of kings and judges, Wednesday the books of Jewish History, Thursday Books of Wisdom, Friday the Prophets, Saturday the Gospels and Sunday the Epistles. The next Monday we pick up at the chapter we left off in ancient history. You may think that this would be disjointed and would cause you to "lose your groove" but I have found the contrary to be true, the threads of promise, redemption and grace show up more clearly as I make my way slowly through these books in a parrallel fashion and when I pick up where I left off a week before I am reminded of things that stood out to me from last week's reading. Journaling is a big part of my processing scripture and fixing particular tidbits in my mind for the purpose of life application. I would love to have you join me!
Basic Reading Plan
Mon (Law): Genesis-Joshua
Tues (Rulers): Judges-Chronicles
Wed (History): Ezra-Psalms
Thurs (Wisdom): Prov-Jer
Fri (Prophets): Lam-Malachi
Sat (Gospels): Matthew-Acts
Sun (Epistles) Romans-Revelation.
The theme I have given each section is general. Joshua is not a book of the law and Psalms is not a book of history. The main chunk of reading in each section is, however, suitably classified as the theme it is under. In order to make the sections even out to have the same general number of books/chapters, this was the closest I could come. Otherwise one would be reading through certain sections (like the Law) for instance, much more often than the wisdom books, etc.
(Fellowship is) an expression of both love and humility. [It] springs from a desire to bring benefit to others, coupled with a sense of personal weakness and need. It has a double motive – the wish to help, and to be helped; to edify, and to be edified. It has a double aim – to do, and to receive, good. It is a seeking by Christian people to know God better through sharing with each other what, individually, they have learned of Him already. J.I. Packer.
A few introductory words of encouragement....
Think of your time feeding on God's Word as a vital aspect of your health and wellness. You wouldn't go a week without brushing your teeth, or eating physical food, don't treat the nourishing of your soul by the Word of God with any less care.
Don't cram multiple chapters if you fall behind of plan, but *do* "back-read" if you have the passion and earnest desire to do so. My habit if I miss a chapter is usually to leave it until that book comes up again the next week (based on my own reading plan) and then read two consecutive chapters rather than the one I am scheduled to read.
Don't be legalistic about the when and how. If you don't get a quiet time in the morning, THAT'S OKAY. Find a moment in the afternoon to grab a drink, sit down and put your feet up, and soak up a chapter. And if that doesn't happen, THAT'S OKAY. Take 15-20 minutes at the end of the day to plump some pillows up in your bed and soak it up before you go to sleep. And if that doesn't happen, IT'S OKAY. Tomorrow is a new day. Don't let the enemy discourage you from spending time in the word TODAY because you didn't YESTERDAY. That's just dumb. Did you get that? DUMB.
If you don't have time to read, meditate. Allow God to bring a passage of scripture to mind and allow yourself to listen. Take time to be quiet in your spirit. While you are washing dishes, folding laundry, vacuuming... cleaning bathrooms.
Spruce things up. Get yourself a PRETTY journal and jot down little things that stand out to you. Use your favourite mug or a pretty glass to pour your favourite drink. Sit in your favourite spot (this could change from day to day and depending on the time of day you read. A sunny spot on the porch in the morning, a wing back chair and a blanket if it's chilly, a garden swing in the shade on a hot afternoon, or plumped up in bed with soft lamplight in the evening. Again, don't be legalistic about the location, pick a happy spot that fits the moment/opportunity.) Oh, and DON'T wait for the pretty journal. Plain lined notepaper or even a crumpled scrap paper will work just FINE until you get one....
Remember while you read, God's word is FOR YOU. yes, it was written to a particular audience in a particular time in history and for a particular reason. But it was also written with YOU in mind, TODAY in mind, and is designed to give you strength and wisdom for the journey.
Claim ONE part of the passage and take it to heart. Read through the chapter without too much introspection at first and see what part most stands out to you. Go back and look at that part more specifically and ask yourself what is in there for YOU?
Ask relevant questions. I usually look at a passage with 2 questions in mind. 1. What does this passage tell me about God's character? 2. What does this passage tell me about humanity (ie, ME, in relation to God? a final and very important question to ask is "What does this passage require of me on a practical level?" Write down one attitude, practice or truth you want you live out TODAY in light of what God has just revealed to you. This is how we take ownership of the Word of God and allow it to relate to us and shape us on a personal level.
Build yourself a monument. As I ponder a passages relevance to me I journal the thoughts that arise. Jotting them down somehow cements my convictions in my mind, almost like laying out stones in a monument so I can go back to that place later and be reminded. I also use those notes to come here and share my thoughts later with others.
Keep your actual quiet time concise. This will help make it more likely the habit will continue to happen on a regular basis. Better to spend 15 minutes in the word daily, than 1 hour once a week.
Don't require absolute "alone" and uninterrupted time (without kids around). If they are around, they can learn to not interrupt you for 15 minutes, just like you spend time with other people when they are around, you can spend time with the Lord with them around too.
Think of God’s Word as a love letter to you. When you read stories of God’s wrath in the Old Testament, think about WHAT love paid the price for all that wrath and how a hand that once smote anyone who dared touch the ark of His covenant now beckons YOU to draw near to the throne of grace. Read everything in light of who God is and how much He loves mankind that in spite of our being so deprived, His love story reaches out, encompasses us, washes us clean, and seeks to draw us near.
May you seek Him, may He be found by you, and may you be blessed on the journey.
4 comments:
I felt a niggling of something as I read this, a hope springing from how God gave David strength and victory to conquer the unconquerable and live triumphantly. I especially was ministered to and challenged by what my devotional notes said, though and think they are worth sharing.
"Through the high and low points of our lives, God graciously provides for our needs. As we experience this, our lives can be filled with joyful expressions of praise to him.
A heart filled with God's heart is free both to glorify and to enjoy God. There is no grimness in David's relationship with God. He could weep out his loneliness and fear to the Lord, but he could also dance with unrestrained fervor. When we love God with all our heart we can openly express our emotions to him, and then to others. He wants us to be real with him. When we are in the valley of despair or the mountain peaks of sublime joy, we can express it.
David's abandoned freedom to express his praise is contrasted with his wife Michal's reserve and contempt... Michal was like her father Saul. Her emotional energy was not guided by firm beliefs about God's sovereignty and grace. There was little in her mind about God's loveingkindness, and therefore little capacity of emotional delight in him...
There are Michals in all our lives. People whose minds are starved for liberating truth about God and whose emotions are stunted by malnutrition of lively belief. The conviction of God's grace results in the expression of joy...
The tragedy of religion is that it produces more Michals than Davids...
From: Lord of the impossible by Lloyd John Ogilvie.
I was stunned to read this this morning after what I shared yesterday. It describes so precisely what I am struggling with.
I'm a bit of a David. I wear my spiritual emotions on my sleeve. When I'm feeling passion, I express it. When I need encouragement, I cry out for it. And this is one of the main things that makes me feel so "awkward" and hungry in a community of stoic, straight laced mennonites who like to keep their emotions packaged up nicely in their bedside tables to be removed and unwrapped only for those in their most intimate circle, if then.
Fellowship was made to be corporate, and true fellowship can't take place without an element of vulnerability and honesty and "to heck with the mask, this is how I really feel and this is what I'm hungry for" and a mutual challenging, encouraging, connecting between souls.
And having this with a few intimate friends while feeling a complete disconnect between myself and church leadership and the body at large doesn't cut it for me. Then I start to ask myself "why even go to church?" The only answer I have is "because we are supposed to." "to socially connect with the body at large". "To be a good example to our kids." Those are pathetic answers and they make me feel pathetic. There is so much more God has designed for us. He wants to meet us with power, He wants us to be centred on Christ, He wants to charge us through the preaching and uplift us as we surrender ourselves in worship to Him. He wants us to be bound together in the bonds of prayer and to experience the intimate love that is birthed out of confession and forgiveness.
We have experienced this in fellowship, and once you have, it's not something that allows you to live contentedly with less. So I struggle within myself, a square peg in a round hole. Afraid to even share my thoughts because they are not uplifting, or encouraging, but stem from the discouragement within me. And yet, it's not out of disrespect or negativity, it's out of hunger and thirst for more of God and more of the victory that He wants to pour out in all of our lives, on our church and on our corporate and individual ministry.
ah... now that was an early morning rant if I ever did see one. Forgive me. Sometimes the dam just backs up so full there's nowhere to spill but over. And then there's a big muddy aftermath... sorry.
A muddy aftermath? How pleased God must be with a heart that longs for honesty - to be real before Him. God created us in His image - He gave us our emotions. And while we should not be ruled by them, we should pay attention to what they are telling us. To grieve or rejoice, those are gifts from God. I have walked in the valley of discouragement, too often in my life, and it led to darkness. Yuck, that's not too encouraging. Then I read Isaiah 45:3, "I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." And then came James 1:2-3, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops..." Darkness and trials develop in me what just doesn't seem to come in the light. Which is not bothersome to God, because the darkness is as light to Him. He sees what is going on even when I miss it. There in the midst of my darkness - He calls me by name and I know He is the Lord God. In the midst of the darkness He give me treasures, mostly the richness of His presence. I'm learning to count is ALL joy! Hence the name of my blog. Hope this encourages you. You are such an encouragement and I have enjoyed peeking in and listening to your heart. It is a creation of beauty!
I love your rants.
I still want to talk about this all over coffee...
I loved this part:
"when you hear the sound of marching in the tops of the balsam trees, then you shall act promptly, for then the Lord will have gone out before you..." v24
I love this image of the Army of the Lord going out invisibly before David, but that he could hear it in the tops of the trees. Like a hundred or so angels marching on ahead of him. Wonderful.
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