I experienced some incredible milestones in my relationship with God this past week. Heard from Him, received from Him, was washed and empowered by Him in ways I have not yet experienced to such amazing and tangible depths. I am praising and thanking Him for what He has shown me, spoken over me, and done in me. I feel like the hunger for "more" in me has been answered and that I am full up to overflowing of Him.
this experience of Jacob's, his vision, and how God communicated with him and confirmed and affirmed His working and plans for Jacob through this vision, resonates with me in a fresh, new and amazing way after the week I just had. I have never been one to get "visions", and have always been rather sceptical of them... like they are just made up pictures in people's heads, whatever. But this week God opened a door in my life that has remained tightly closed until now and he gave me two very distinct visions, that were confirmed in amazing and thrilling ways... and throughout the course of the week he brought both visions to pass. I will try to share my story here, for His glory. But it's rather long so I will have to do it in a few posts.
During the first session at camp the speaker wanted to lead us into a time of quiet, of coming to rest before God and emptying ourselves of distractions and prepare ourselves to hear from Him. He encouraged us to listen and watch carefully if God brought any verse, word, or picture to mind.
A picture came into my mind almost immediately. It was the strangest thign because it has NEVER happened to me before, usually God and I communicate with words. But I had this picture of me on a beach, sitting quietly, surrounded by many, many people, bustling around, almost like in fast forward speed, this sense of God on His throne above, and this picture of Him pouring pails of water out from Heaven and them washing over me, very warm and wonderful, and I knew that the pails were filled with Peace. He was pouring pails of peace out upon my head. It was interesting because I thought to myself "that's weird, the pails, shouldn't it be like rain, or something? Doesn't the bible talk about God "raining down" peace, or grace or whatever? And I tried to force the picture to change to rain, but I couldn't. It was clearly pails of water. Pails of peace.
That was it. Our quiet time over the speaker asked if there was anything that anyone wanted to share, if a verse, or image or message had come to them. One lady across the room, shared the words of a verse that had come to her in song "my peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you, not as the world gives....." the speaker then responded to her with a comment about how "God does not want us to receive a mere pitter patter of peace, He wants to pour pails of peace out upon our heads." I just about started hyperventilating at that point as you can well imagine, and I with a heart beating out of my chest I shared the image that I had seen. It was SO amazing. Such a powerful presence of God giving us a clear message as a group, it was almost electric for me.
Then later in the week I experienced another vision, it was of my heart, all bound up with thick ropes around and around it all knotted with tight sailor ropes and my heart feeling so constricted, and wanting to be released from the pressure. My fingers were trying frantically to untie the knots but I couldn't loosen them at all. Then I heard this voice saying, "Let go.... Let me." And when I let my hands fall, the ropes just unravelled and fell away.
I had a sense of understanding it, through a fog, in a way but it was not until the end of the week that everything came together, and peaked and reached fulfillment. The night before we left some issues came up with certain people that allowed me to put my finger on my own inner struggle of late. I came to the point of being tired of crying out for God to heal me of all the "wrong" stuff that kept coming up in this one relationship, so frustrated that I couldn't get over it, get past it, "loosen the knots if you will." On the last day of camp, at the very end of our last staff meeting when we were all turning to go I just grabbed hold of the speaker and told him that I couldn't leave without asking Him to pray over me regarding this issue.
I told him very little, but he is the kind of person where a little goes a long way. He addressed every key issue in me with every catch word applicable and imaginable to my situation... offense, rejection, insecurity.... he had me confess them all... it was so "right" everything he was saying. And then he told me "God wants you to know that you have been trying to do this on your own strenght for too long.... this is not a work you can accomplish on your own power, he wants you to let go, and let Him."
I started sobbing at that point. Because God had already told me that earlier that week, but in that moment it all "clicked" and I felt a wave of something warm and powerful sweep over me from myhead to my feet and I bet you know what it was, right? PEACE. The feeling of pails of warm peace pouring over me.
I just wanted to share this while it was all fresh and undiluted by the passage of time. I want to thank God and praise Him for revealing Himself to me in ways I never could have imagined, and I want to testify to His power and glory that I have experienced at work in me and I want to thank Him for the new understanding and freedom that I don't have to fight to be all he wants me to be, I have to let go, and let Him accomplish mighty things in and for me.
Ruth 3 I was struck when Boaz said, "If he wishes to redeem you, very well." How hard it is for me to say "this is what I want but if God has other plans, very well." Boaz' attitude in this situation was such a "The Lord's will will be done" attitude. I want to have that attitude, but I am not mature enough to truly have it most of the time. I just still am like a little kid who wants what I want and wants it right now.
the last part of this chapter really spoke to me, v15, how God restores the HUMBLE and revives the courage of those with repentant hearts. v 16 "I will not fight against you forever..." later "I withdrew from them, but they kept going on their own stubborn way. I have seen what they can do, but I will heal them anyway!.... May they have abundant peace, both near and far..... but those who still reject me are like the restless sea, which is never still but continually churns up mud and dirt. There is no peace for them."
God is faithful and gracious but sometimes we surround ourselves with turmoil by not being willing to humble ourselves, repent and RECEIVE that peace because we wrestle with our flesh, our pride, our own stubborn will and patterns.
We are reading our way through the bible one chapter per day. The idea behind my personal reading plan is to read through books chronologically, but not solely one book at a time. Thus on Monday we read from the books of the law, Tuesday the books of kings and judges, Wednesday the books of Jewish History, Thursday Books of Wisdom, Friday the Prophets, Saturday the Gospels and Sunday the Epistles. The next Monday we pick up at the chapter we left off in ancient history. You may think that this would be disjointed and would cause you to "lose your groove" but I have found the contrary to be true, the threads of promise, redemption and grace show up more clearly as I make my way slowly through these books in a parrallel fashion and when I pick up where I left off a week before I am reminded of things that stood out to me from last week's reading. Journaling is a big part of my processing scripture and fixing particular tidbits in my mind for the purpose of life application. I would love to have you join me!
Basic Reading Plan
Mon (Law): Genesis-Joshua
Tues (Rulers): Judges-Chronicles
Wed (History): Ezra-Psalms
Thurs (Wisdom): Prov-Jer
Fri (Prophets): Lam-Malachi
Sat (Gospels): Matthew-Acts
Sun (Epistles) Romans-Revelation.
The theme I have given each section is general. Joshua is not a book of the law and Psalms is not a book of history. The main chunk of reading in each section is, however, suitably classified as the theme it is under. In order to make the sections even out to have the same general number of books/chapters, this was the closest I could come. Otherwise one would be reading through certain sections (like the Law) for instance, much more often than the wisdom books, etc.
(Fellowship is) an expression of both love and humility. [It] springs from a desire to bring benefit to others, coupled with a sense of personal weakness and need. It has a double motive – the wish to help, and to be helped; to edify, and to be edified. It has a double aim – to do, and to receive, good. It is a seeking by Christian people to know God better through sharing with each other what, individually, they have learned of Him already. J.I. Packer.
A few introductory words of encouragement....
Think of your time feeding on God's Word as a vital aspect of your health and wellness. You wouldn't go a week without brushing your teeth, or eating physical food, don't treat the nourishing of your soul by the Word of God with any less care.
Don't cram multiple chapters if you fall behind of plan, but *do* "back-read" if you have the passion and earnest desire to do so. My habit if I miss a chapter is usually to leave it until that book comes up again the next week (based on my own reading plan) and then read two consecutive chapters rather than the one I am scheduled to read.
Don't be legalistic about the when and how. If you don't get a quiet time in the morning, THAT'S OKAY. Find a moment in the afternoon to grab a drink, sit down and put your feet up, and soak up a chapter. And if that doesn't happen, THAT'S OKAY. Take 15-20 minutes at the end of the day to plump some pillows up in your bed and soak it up before you go to sleep. And if that doesn't happen, IT'S OKAY. Tomorrow is a new day. Don't let the enemy discourage you from spending time in the word TODAY because you didn't YESTERDAY. That's just dumb. Did you get that? DUMB.
If you don't have time to read, meditate. Allow God to bring a passage of scripture to mind and allow yourself to listen. Take time to be quiet in your spirit. While you are washing dishes, folding laundry, vacuuming... cleaning bathrooms.
Spruce things up. Get yourself a PRETTY journal and jot down little things that stand out to you. Use your favourite mug or a pretty glass to pour your favourite drink. Sit in your favourite spot (this could change from day to day and depending on the time of day you read. A sunny spot on the porch in the morning, a wing back chair and a blanket if it's chilly, a garden swing in the shade on a hot afternoon, or plumped up in bed with soft lamplight in the evening. Again, don't be legalistic about the location, pick a happy spot that fits the moment/opportunity.) Oh, and DON'T wait for the pretty journal. Plain lined notepaper or even a crumpled scrap paper will work just FINE until you get one....
Remember while you read, God's word is FOR YOU. yes, it was written to a particular audience in a particular time in history and for a particular reason. But it was also written with YOU in mind, TODAY in mind, and is designed to give you strength and wisdom for the journey.
Claim ONE part of the passage and take it to heart. Read through the chapter without too much introspection at first and see what part most stands out to you. Go back and look at that part more specifically and ask yourself what is in there for YOU?
Ask relevant questions. I usually look at a passage with 2 questions in mind. 1. What does this passage tell me about God's character? 2. What does this passage tell me about humanity (ie, ME, in relation to God? a final and very important question to ask is "What does this passage require of me on a practical level?" Write down one attitude, practice or truth you want you live out TODAY in light of what God has just revealed to you. This is how we take ownership of the Word of God and allow it to relate to us and shape us on a personal level.
Build yourself a monument. As I ponder a passages relevance to me I journal the thoughts that arise. Jotting them down somehow cements my convictions in my mind, almost like laying out stones in a monument so I can go back to that place later and be reminded. I also use those notes to come here and share my thoughts later with others.
Keep your actual quiet time concise. This will help make it more likely the habit will continue to happen on a regular basis. Better to spend 15 minutes in the word daily, than 1 hour once a week.
Don't require absolute "alone" and uninterrupted time (without kids around). If they are around, they can learn to not interrupt you for 15 minutes, just like you spend time with other people when they are around, you can spend time with the Lord with them around too.
Think of God’s Word as a love letter to you. When you read stories of God’s wrath in the Old Testament, think about WHAT love paid the price for all that wrath and how a hand that once smote anyone who dared touch the ark of His covenant now beckons YOU to draw near to the throne of grace. Read everything in light of who God is and how much He loves mankind that in spite of our being so deprived, His love story reaches out, encompasses us, washes us clean, and seeks to draw us near.
May you seek Him, may He be found by you, and may you be blessed on the journey.
9 comments:
I experienced some incredible milestones in my relationship with God this past week. Heard from Him, received from Him, was washed and empowered by Him in ways I have not yet experienced to such amazing and tangible depths. I am praising and thanking Him for what He has shown me, spoken over me, and done in me. I feel like the hunger for "more" in me has been answered and that I am full up to overflowing of Him.
this experience of Jacob's, his vision, and how God communicated with him and confirmed and affirmed His working and plans for Jacob through this vision, resonates with me in a fresh, new and amazing way after the week I just had. I have never been one to get "visions", and have always been rather sceptical of them... like they are just made up pictures in people's heads, whatever. But this week God opened a door in my life that has remained tightly closed until now and he gave me two very distinct visions, that were confirmed in amazing and thrilling ways... and throughout the course of the week he brought both visions to pass. I will try to share my story here, for His glory. But it's rather long so I will have to do it in a few posts.
During the first session at camp the speaker wanted to lead us into a time of quiet, of coming to rest before God and emptying ourselves of distractions and prepare ourselves to hear from Him. He encouraged us to listen and watch carefully if God brought any verse, word, or picture to mind.
A picture came into my mind almost immediately. It was the strangest thign because it has NEVER happened to me before, usually God and I communicate with words. But I had this picture of me on a beach, sitting quietly, surrounded by many, many people, bustling around, almost like in fast forward speed, this sense of God on His throne above, and this picture of Him pouring pails of water out from Heaven and them washing over me, very warm and wonderful, and I knew that the pails were filled with Peace. He was pouring pails of peace out upon my head. It was interesting because I thought to myself "that's weird, the pails, shouldn't it be like rain, or something? Doesn't the bible talk about God "raining down" peace, or grace or whatever? And I tried to force the picture to change to rain, but I couldn't. It was clearly pails of water. Pails of peace.
That was it. Our quiet time over the speaker asked if there was anything that anyone wanted to share, if a verse, or image or message had come to them. One lady across the room, shared the words of a verse that had come to her in song "my peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you, not as the world gives....." the speaker then responded to her with a comment about how "God does not want us to receive a mere pitter patter of peace, He wants to pour pails of peace out upon our heads." I just about started hyperventilating at that point as you can well imagine, and I with a heart beating out of my chest I shared the image that I had seen. It was SO amazing. Such a powerful presence of God giving us a clear message as a group, it was almost electric for me.
Then later in the week I experienced another vision, it was of my heart, all bound up with thick ropes around and around it all knotted with tight sailor ropes and my heart feeling so constricted, and wanting to be released from the pressure. My fingers were trying frantically to untie the knots but I couldn't loosen them at all. Then I heard this voice saying, "Let go.... Let me." And when I let my hands fall, the ropes just unravelled and fell away.
I had a sense of understanding it, through a fog, in a way but it was not until the end of the week that everything came together, and peaked and reached fulfillment. The night before we left some issues came up with certain people that allowed me to put my finger on my own inner struggle of late. I came to the point of being tired of crying out for God to heal me of all the "wrong" stuff that kept coming up in this one relationship, so frustrated that I couldn't get over it, get past it, "loosen the knots if you will." On the last day of camp, at the very end of our last staff meeting when we were all turning to go I just grabbed hold of the speaker and told him that I couldn't leave without asking Him to pray over me regarding this issue.
I told him very little, but he is the kind of person where a little goes a long way. He addressed every key issue in me with every catch word applicable and imaginable to my situation... offense, rejection, insecurity.... he had me confess them all... it was so "right" everything he was saying. And then he told me "God wants you to know that you have been trying to do this on your own strenght for too long.... this is not a work you can accomplish on your own power, he wants you to let go, and let Him."
I started sobbing at that point. Because God had already told me that earlier that week, but in that moment it all "clicked" and I felt a wave of something warm and powerful sweep over me from myhead to my feet and I bet you know what it was, right? PEACE. The feeling of pails of warm peace pouring over me.
I just wanted to share this while it was all fresh and undiluted by the passage of time. I want to thank God and praise Him for revealing Himself to me in ways I never could have imagined, and I want to testify to His power and glory that I have experienced at work in me and I want to thank Him for the new understanding and freedom that I don't have to fight to be all he wants me to be, I have to let go, and let Him accomplish mighty things in and for me.
Thanks so much, PC, for sharing such deep things from your heart.
Ruth 3 I was struck when Boaz said, "If he wishes to redeem you, very well." How hard it is for me to say "this is what I want but if God has other plans, very well." Boaz' attitude in this situation was such a "The Lord's will will be done" attitude. I want to have that attitude, but I am not mature enough to truly have it most of the time. I just still am like a little kid who wants what I want and wants it right now.
psalm 53. The truly wise will seek God.
the last part of this chapter really spoke to me, v15, how God restores the HUMBLE and revives the courage of those with repentant hearts. v 16 "I will not fight against you forever..." later "I withdrew from them, but they kept going on their own stubborn way. I have seen what they can do, but I will heal them anyway!.... May they have abundant peace, both near and far..... but those who still reject me are like the restless sea, which is never still but continually churns up mud and dirt. There is no peace for them."
God is faithful and gracious but sometimes we surround ourselves with turmoil by not being willing to humble ourselves, repent and RECEIVE that peace because we wrestle with our flesh, our pride, our own stubborn will and patterns.
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